Missed Her Window

I'm sure most people sneaking a peek at this blog are also on FB. If you're not, the posting hiatus does not mean that I have delivered. I've just been lazy.

When I was pregnant with Abigail, I delivered 9 days past my due date (went into labor on Day 8, but it was 19.5 hours and spilled into Day 9). Somewhere around 4 days past due, I arrived at a very Zen place. Rather than anxiously believe I could deliver at any moment, I'd decided that I'd missed my window and it just wasn't going to happen. We all know that the baby has to get out eventually, but it made those last few days much more relaxing. Well, I reached that stage a couple of days ago. I'm 8 days past my due date and I just figure she's missed her chance.

I will keep everyone posted, as I have a midwife appointment this afternoon (won't even acknowledge the ginormous amount of weight I've gained with this pregnancy...starting out lighter does not comfort my ego in the slightest) which will lead to an ultrasound appointment to check amniotic fluid levels, movement, heart rate, etc... Hopefully by evening we will have a plan of action and an end date in mind, but I'm hoping that this lady comes on her own. Abigail has placed her bets on tomorrow. Let's hope she's right!

Sometimes You Can't Escape Your Education

No baby. Just to answer the question you were checking this site for.

I took Abigail to the allergist to see how much peanut she could eat before having a reaction. The baby cooperated and is still snuggly in my uterus. Despite it being the first week of school, we were willing to interrupt the routine to gather some important information about our daughter's allergy. Major let-down.

Upon scheduling the appointment (two months ago), they give no special instructions. They give you a reminder call the day before, and-oh-btw, please be sure you haven't given your child any anti-histamine for 48 hours. Well, too late for that. It is summertime and seasonal allergies are alive an well. If allergies weren't an issue for us, we wouldn't be regular visitors at the allergist, right? The nice lady tells us it should be ok and to come in anyway. We arrive, pay our co-pay (not cheap), go over Abigail's history, subject her to another scratch test to get a more relevant picture, only for the doc to say...."she really should be off her anti-histamine for 4-5 days to get an accurate response from the skin test and ingestion test." So, now we have to reschedule (another 2 month wait), I've interrupted an already stressful first week of school for my daughter, stressed over whether I would have to cancel last minute due to labor, all to find out nothing and have to come again.

This is the point that I can not escape my education. I think to myself if only a system had been in place to give the "heads-up" phone call a week in advance. If only they had conveyed that anti-histamines should be stopped for 4-5 days, not just 2 then this all could have been avoided. Instead, I wasted a lengthy appointment that could have better been filled by a new patient or several established patients. I spent time and money (resources in short supply these days) on something completely unproductive. As trendy as healthcare reform is these days, I can't help but see this as just another way that the system can be improved. It wouldn't cost a dime and the solution is not that complicated. A few simple changes can really go a long way to improving what is broken. I love our allergist, but everyone has room for improvement.

Looks like we'll try again in November and maybe I won't put the whole experience under a microscope again.

The Waiting Game

Well, we seem to be doing a lot of waiting this year.

When will Brian get an interview for the all the jobs he's applied to?

Brian got an interview, when will they let us know if he has the job?

Repeat

I interview for nursing positions..oh a hiring freeze....when will I know if I have a job, let alone one on a unit I want?

Financial aid is behind, when will they be cutting checks?

Someone is having surgery, when will we hear they did ok?

Baby was due three days ago, when will she get here?!

Some of these questions have already been answered, but many are still unknowns. Many keep repeating themselves, only to leave us waiting some more. I am typically a pretty patient person, but I could really use a little predictability in my life. At least the option to look at the full hand and run through the various ways it will play out. I've tried to keep busy, but I am running out of distractions. While I will still be in waiting mode for some of these questions, I know for certain I will have one very tiny and adorable distraction in no more than 10 days.

Until then, I'll keep my ears open for all the shoes to drop.

Curious Ticker

I've enjoyed the funny baby ticker I've had at the top of my blog for the last 32 weeks or so. I'm quite curious what it will say tomorrow or if the programmer decided to come up with quippy comments for 40 weeks, then quit. Given that 42 weeks is still within the realm of normal, I will be disappointed to have my ticker achieve it's conclusion before I achieve mine, delivery. I will also not be surprised.

Just keeping it low key today. Brian is working on freelance work and I'm trying to stand as little as possible. Mostly because this baby loves to give me inguinal charley horses that make my right leg give out on me and are most uncomfortable. Also, my midwife is out of town today. I figure, she ought to be back by late evening, so I would probably be safe going into labor sometime around dinner time. She ought to be back on call by the time I need her services. I can get through the first 70% of labor on my own. It's just that last hurdle that I need help with.

We'll see what tomorrow's morning appointment holds in store for us. A biophysical profile for early in the week and more waiting? We shall see.

What Really Matters

Despite my previous posts, I am reminded today that it does not really matter when our baby arrives. We have no control over when we are born or when we die. Along the way, we will face challenges with jobs, disease, and family. While there is nothing I can do to control the inevitable, I can control how I respond to it. I can stress less about the "what ifs" that may or may not be and focus more on what is real and in front of me. I won't give up planning and organizing what little I do have control over, but the rest I will just take as it comes and come out the other side better and stronger for it.

In Case You Are Following

No baby today. Autumn keeps saying the baby is still getting bigger until it 'pops' out. Makes me feel like Jiffy Pop.

Never know who really follows this blog. I imagine many of the followers are also on FB and are probably aware that I am still at home. I know some moms are great at tweeting, FB, blogging during labor, but I don't forsee that being me. The pain is overwhelming and I can really handle being separated from technology for 8-24 hours. For those of you anxiously awaiting, we will announce as soon as marvelled over our newest addition. She's ours and I'll be greedy and not feel guilty for keeping her off the web a whole 6-12 hours. Of course, I'm equally guilty of anxiously awaiting those first pics, the name and the basic stats.

I know, I know...I have no say over when she makes an appearance, but it would be very gracious of her to either come tomorrow or Friday or she should just wait a week. As I've mentioned, my midwife is out of town on Sunday. I can manage any other day (despite what is to follow), but not Sunday. My brother has surgery on Tuesday and it would be equally nice for my mom to meet her granddaughter fresh out of the oven and be with her son's family during their stress. If push comes to shove, my little lady will be just as tiny and cuddly 2 days after she is born. Both kids have appointments next Thurdsay at the same time, but at two different places. This would be much easier to accomplish with two parents. Once could be rescheduled, but still. Plus, Tuesday is the first day of school. Brian is a pro at getting the girls up and Abigail on the bus, but I would still like to see her off that first day.

So, if I may be so bold as to request from you, NuBaby Murphy....Please come in the next 48 hours, if not get comfy and wait until September. Thanks!

39 and 3

Well, no baby yet. I've decided she was ready to come last week when I had all my aches and pains. But then I fell and bumped her back up. She's head down, but not nearly as snuggly in my pelvis as she was before. Sorry, lady. Actually, the pregnancy has been quite comfortable the last few days-- the knee is killing me, but not the belly.

I've just about completed her stocking. It really helped to have a name. Abigail keeps trying to sneek a peek at what name I've put on the stocking, but I won't let her see lest she spill the beans. I guess I wasn't clear because when I told her not to peek at the Christmas stocking, she asked, "I don't get to know her name until Christmas?" Silly girl. Of course she'll get to know the name as soon as the baby arrives.

Today was a double playdate day for Abigail, I'm picking up my diploma, and meeting up with a friend for a refreshing beverage. Tomorrow is Open House and we get to meet Abigail's teacher and learn what the daily schedule will be like for her. I imagine several forms to be filled out will accompany this event.

So, I suppose the baby can come any day. Brian can do most of this stuff, if I'm recovering at the hospital. My midwife has made just one request....I can not have this baby on my due date. She will be out of town that day. While her backup MD is very nice, I really don't want someone to just come in and catch the baby. I want my midwife there to encourage me, run me a bath, massage my back, suggest the birthing ball, keep me out of the bed and moving around. So, let's hope she cooperates. The other girls always accomodated Brian's print deadlines, so I figure the least this one can do is pick any other day to be born besides her due date. The chances of that happening are statistically low, anyway.

tick....tock....tick.....tock.....

39 weeks

The waiting game is on. Now that the name has been decided, I'm getting ancy. I feel like I've finally done everything that I need to prepare for this new little lady and now it's just a matter of waiting for the other shoe (errr...baby) to drop. I am enjoying the time I have left with just two kids. Two is so easy. I should relax while I can. If you know me at all, you know I am horrible at doing nothing productive. At the same time, I would love to have a September baby so that Babigyrl can have a fun sounding birthday like her big sisters. Abgail has 05-04-03, Autumn has 11-11-05 and it's a holiday...wouldn't it be neat if we had a 09-01-09? Again, nothing I have control over and is meaningless in the big scheme of things, but it's still fun to me.

The next couple of weeks are going to be particularly busy. We got Abigail's first grade teacher assignmnet, we've got open house this week, then school starts a week from Tuesday. Throw in dentist appointments for the little ones, a peanut challenge for the big one, and an opportunity for a freelance gig for Brian as editor-for-the-day and our schedule is packed. It would also be nice to get my summer financial aid money before the baby arrives, especially since I have been done with school for 2 weeks now and will be picking up my degree this week. I am shocked and appauled that they were 13 weeks behind on cutting checks. I don't want to be sitting in financial aid with a 2 day old trying to hunt down the person who can end this confusion.

I'll keep ya'll posted if I feel any twinges of labor. My midwife says that all third time moms have at least one round of false labor, but at this stage in the game, I think I am comfortable with assuming any significant contractions are the real deal.

Random Aches and Pains

Well, it seems for me that the third pregnancy is much achier than the first two. Again, I acknowledge that I am better off than most and some of the aches and pains are my own making. Like yesterday, I was at the pool with the girls when I see Autumn about eat the pavement. With the gracefulness of an elephant (and the weight of one, too), I leap out of the water and attempt to catch her before she skins her knees. Not only did I not reach her in time, but I came crumbling down like a Godzilla and skinned my knees. I surprised you didn't feel a small earth quake around 4 pm yesterday. And the ironic part is, Autumn didn't even skin her knees. Of course, a 38+ week pregnant lady falling freaks a lot of people out. I tried to reassure everyone I was fine, the belly did not make contact with the concrete and it's no biggie if this catastrophe sent me into labor because....38+ weeks, hello? Really I just felt embarassed that my own arms can't hold up my upper body anymore. This is very reminiscent of when I was prenant with Abigail. I was 40 weeks and tripped up my front porch. Got a huge scrape and bruise on my knee. Still didn't deliver for another 9 days and every time they said "pull back on your knees and give a big push" I cringed because everyone kept poking the still-healing, and quite painful, scab. Looks like I will have to accomodate a bum knee again during labor, only this time I'm hoping to find a less traditional, and scab-poking- way to push this baby out. Needless to say, my body now aches like a post car accident victim.

I have also had my first experiences looking like the characters on tv that go into labor who looks normal one moment, then doubles over in pain declaring a sudden and intense onset of labor. I mimicked this unrealistic portrayal of labor while waiting in line to return some items. Babigyrl (as my friends have named her) gave a whopping kick to the cervix-or possibly just engaged- forcing me to hunch over a little, grimace and control my breathing. Poor lady behind the counter asked me if I was okay, with a look of fear that I might deliver a baby right there in the store. I reassured her it was just a really strong kick, but I don't think I was very convincing.

Luckily, my doozy of a day was topped off with Girl's Night Out, turned into Surprise Baby Shower. I was just excited to finally catch up with friends after a gruelling 2 years of nursing school. The company was the best part. We got enjoy sitting out on the restaurant patio, I ate a delicious turtle cheesecake, I was relaxed and surrounded by friends. And as an added bonus, they came bearing gifts. I got cute little girl outfits with ruffle bottoms, gift cards (because we need lots of diapers), and a sleek new diaper bag (not too bulky, not too tiny, stylish even for dad to carry, and absent of 6 years worth of cheerio crumbs). They even joined it up with some cards and gifts for graduating from school. I'm not an overly gushy person, but I have been very touched by the support from friends for our new Babigyrl, my endeavours in grad school, and our seemingly endless journey in unemployment. With such a great group of friends, I know that we will always have someone there to rely on and remind us of what really matters in life. The very basic of necessities and a handful of incredible relationships.

THANKS LADIES!!

No Time for a Baby

I have so much to do this week that I really don't have time to deliver a baby. Hopefully she will hold out.

Brian and I celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary yesterday. That means we've been together for 11 years. The time has absolutely flown by. I have to be honest, I love being married. I know some people say it's 'a lot of work', but I have always found that the best relationships are the ones that come naturally. No doubt we've been faced with the stresses of parenting, moves, unemployment and grad school (twice). While those have been challenging, I wouldn't say they made us have to work harder at being married. With communication and compromise, we can plow through the tough life stuff and enjoy the good stuff. Happy 8th Anniversary Brian. I love you through and through.

No Time for Words

I shall try to sum up the latest hiatus in pics. No baby pics yet, folks, but we've been plenty busy around here.

A generous and well-organized classmate of mine hosted a baby shower for me and my pregnant classmates. Loads of fun and very generous gifts. Thanks ladies and gentlemen.

Then I presented my Capstone Project and was officially done with school work! This is what was waiting for me when I arrived home thanks to Brian and my Mom and my friend Marie.

Then I had my graduation and pinning ceremony.

I devoured the Twilight series thanks to a friend of a friend that kept my supply up.

I've lived in C-ville for 5 years and have never tried Sticks. A real shame, but it was tastey.

Took my mom to the Kluge-Ruhe Aboriginal Art Museum for her birthday. Awesome.

This week is just as busy. I'm down to weekly appointments with my midwife every Monday. We're going out for our 8 year anniversary on Tuesday. I've got a date with my girlfriends to catch up after my very busy summer (and my BFF who has been out of town for over a month). After that, I think the baby can arrive (so long as it is before 3 days before the first day of school, or one day after). Not that I have any say, but the other girls were very good at abiding by deadlines and I'm hoping this little lady is no exception.

Intriguing, I know...

Almost the End of an Era

So today kicks off my class's final presentations. It feels so great to being so close to the end. The irony isn't lost on me that I am scheduled to present on the very last day, only third from the end. I will also be 36 and 5 days pregnant at the time. Not presenting today instead of Friday was really going to buy me that much time, but still. I'm kind of excited to present because I dug deep and got creative with PowerPoint. The audience will be amazed.

As for the rest of life, I have been obsessively reading the Twilight series (I resisted as long as I could and I've fallen into the trap with the rest of you). I am currently craving my habit while I wait for a friend of a neighbor to drop off the last two books. The library wait is 35 deep and I can't justify buying the books on our budget. Withdrawal sucks.

Our family of four is soon to be a family of five. I had another midwife appointment on Monday. Abigail shared with her her overwhelming Star Wars knowledge. It was very cute. Baby is kicking up a storm and I don't think she really gets the whole "fetal position" thing. I think she prefers jumping jacks.

I realized today that I've got 3.5 weeks left +/- 2 if I go to term. That means I could be just 10 days away from delivering!!! Given my track record, I'm thinking I probably have 39 days left, but anything is possible. I have also hit the weight that I was at when I delivered the other two. I always had a theory that, despite starting off ten pounds lighter with this pregnancy, my body was going to strive to hit the same maximum density. I guess my body is being an over-achiever this time around because I think it will break it's record by a couple of pounds. Dandy. Just don't leave any stretch marks and I'll forgive you.

Lucky for me, the nursery is all ready to go. We are just reusing all of Autumn's stuff, so it really was an easy feat. Thanks go out to all my classmates that threw me (and my two other pregnant classmates) a baby shower last weekend. Diapers galore...I'm in heaven. Now I've just got to pack my overnight bag for the hospital and look into pre-registering. Who wants to get to the hospital 8 cm dilated and then find out they have to fill out a bunch of paperwork.

Well, all that's left is picking out a name for this little lady. We promise we will have a name. Even if we miraculously agree on something a week before the baby gets here, we're not telling. You'll just have to wait like everyone else. Can't wait to see what the future holds.

Post-Secret Inverted

So, I got tagged by my SIL to do this little meme. I'm not sure I can come up with 20, but I will give it my best. In short, I will list some of my thoughts and feelings about someone without mentioning who they are directed to. She described it much more eloquently than I am, so I will quote her, "Basically, you list 20 things you would love to say to various people in your life, without attaching names or context ."

Praises may be spoken aloud more often than grievances, but I still don't think they are said nearly enough.

1. I don't like it when you take credit for my accomplishments. I'm not saying you haven't contributed, but you are not the only one who could have helped me get to where I am today.

2. It's not always about you.

3. Spending time with you is always a blast. It's like we're kindred spirits. Know that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to because you are smart, funny, and kind.

4. You may be strong willed, but you challenge me daily and I am better for it.

5. Your generosity and sweetness is something I strive to achieve. If everyone were like you the world would be a much better place.

6. There's too much history to toss it all aside, despite that I regularly feel like I give more than I get. I know you are going through a tough time, but is there ever a time that you're not?

7. We may have very different personalities, but we agree on the important stuff and that is what makes our relationship so rich and balanced.

8. To each his own. I am not judging you. If you feel judged, then maybe you are not comfortable with yourself or your choices.

9. I know behind your actions are always good intentions. If you were upfront about them, then I wouldn't feel like you were trying to steal my power.

10. How did you get so jaded and cynical? Life isn't always easy, but good or bad this is life. Make the most of it and appreciate what you have or you will die having done nothing and being miserable the whole time.

11. It's not always your way or my way. There are many ways, neither right nor wrong, and that is okay.

Well, 11 will have to do. I have to get lunch ready for the girls and this can be quite time consuming. I think just about all of those apply to more than one person. If you think it isn't about you, it probably is. If you think it is about you, you're probably right because I've probably said directly to you. Does this post make me sound bitter or content? It is what it is, I suppose.

Unbelievable

I can not believe there is only 16 days, 10 hours, and 45 minutes left until nursing school is over.

I can not believe that there is only ~40 days until our new baby girl arrives (and we still don't have a name).

I can not believe I will not receive my summer financial aid before my last day of class.

I can not believe how hard it is to find a job in this economy, but us Murphys are a strong and persistent people.

I can not believe how often I have to pee. My bladder will be happen to no longer be a punching bag.

I can not believe that I wouldn't be upset if this baby came a week or two early so that I can spend extra time with her and be less miserable. I love being pregnant, why is it less fun this time?

I can not believe how excited the girls get when I blow a bubble with gum. If only I was so easily amused.

Don't Stereotype...It's Not the Hormones

***ignore the formating, i've tried to fix it at least 5 times and damn blogspot keeps omitting my spacing. Just add it to the rant***

No doubt, life of late has been a little stressful. School, unemployment, baby-on-board, and ridiculous comments from the public-at-large. Here's a little sampling from today's remarks:

"Wow, you really are pregnant!" from a well-meaning professor.

"You must be due any day now." from a random patron at the grocery store.

"Indulging today?" from the grocery checker in reference to a piece of chocolate. I tell said grocery checker, "It's not for me. My husband is having a bad day and I thought he would enjoy a piece of cake."

Well, this just launches the grocery checker into a tale about how people try to spend money to indulge themselves and make themselves feel better. About how in this economic climate indulging ourselves does not help us save money and invest in things that bring about true happiness....seriuosly?

Look lady, I spent $1 on a piece of chocolate cake. It's not some fancy, bakery $5-a-slice-piece-of-decadence. And so what if I do choose to attempt indulging a little. Believe me, I am all too aware of how sucky our economy is right now. I feel it every day.

To top it off, my discount card reflects my awesome UVA discount and the grocery checker immdiately assumes it is my husbands employee discount. What, can't a pregnant lady grocery shopping in the middle of the afternoon be the owner of a UVA discount?

For the record, my 'indulgent' self saved $13.59 on a grocery bill of $30.12. Just ask my husband, I am painfully thrifty. And while I may be carrying bigger than I did with my first two pregnancies, I am in no way large in any noteworthy way.

Here are a couple of cute pics of the girls, just to show I'm not all spit and spunk. (and a gorgeous pregancy a friend of mine took just two weeks ago to show I'm not that huge).

Me and my cute husband at a wedding a month ago.

I can not believe it's anther pic of me and Brian. We never have pics of the two of us.

Sweet little Autumn. Don't let the shy smile fool you!

Always dramatic and girly. Abigail on the 4th.

A plug for my friend's photography http://www.kerihensleyphotography.com/

(and for the record, that is not that ginormous for 31 weeks)

Happy 5th!

I suppose more people enjoy the festivities of the 4th, but I'm really enjoying the sleepy Sunday that is the 5th of July. Today marks 33 weeks of pregnancy, and despite what my ticker says, I do not have cankles. Pregnancy brings with it all sorts of stereotypical ailments... morning sickness, swelling, sore back, waddling, gaining the weight of a 3, 4, or 5 year old.... I am very grateful that I am not one of them, I tend to get the more unusual pubic symphisis pain or tingly toes. My midwife appointment this past week was very reassuring. My month of uber-weight gain magically reversed itself. Instead of the two-pound a week pace I had gained or the one pound a week gain expected, I came in at 1/2 pound a week. Can't say that I did that much different, the body just decided to slow down its pound-packing pace. Thank goodness.

Found another great car seat sale and purchased Autumn her new car seat just like Abigail's RadianXT. Two super sleek car seats and room for the infant seat. Woo Hoo! Three car seats can safely be installed in our VUE. What a relief. It's nice to have that weight off my shoulders. I'm not big on 'gut feelings', but for some reason I feel like this baby isn't go to allow me to enjoy the extra time of being post-due like my others did. Just getting me through the program without too much stress has been more than I can ask for, so my hoping she will hold out until September just makes me feel like I'm pressing my luck. I figured Brian's job loss was a big enough Whammy for one pregnancy, but I am prepping myself for one more.

4th of July was fun and relaxing. A morning at the pool, a little work on a group project during the girls' naps, then off to a BBQ with some friends. All 8 kids played awesome together. No fighting or tears, just hours of fun. We were hoping to make it to the city fireworks, but after a 15 minutes of driveway fireworks, it was clear the little ladies were bonking fast. Poor Abigail was so tired at 9:15 that she cried most of the way home. And, let the record reflect, the girls did NOT sleep in this morning. Instead, they're just cranky because they didn't get enough sleep. It was worth for the special occasion, but I don't know how parents keep their kids up regularly and not go clinically insane.

I will try to post pictures later in the month. Our digital camera is a real thorn in my already lazy picture documentation of my kids' lives. It's slow to snap a shot and the batter loses it's charge lickety-split. Plus, this next week I plan on completing my last 60 clinical hours, plus 6 hours of class and homework. Any spare time I have will be with the girls or Brian. The internet fans will have to wait.

Hope everyone out there is shiny and happy.

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday, Brian!!!

It's been a crazy year juggling my school schedule, pregnancy, job loss, overall family craziness...

Next year is sure to bring us hope, security, comfort and happiness....in addition to sleep deprivation and lots of schedule juggling. I wouldn't want to go through any of this with anyone else. Plus, despite all the stresses, we still have a lot of fun together.

Go Team! Happy Birthday! Here's to a great year ahead!

Kisses.

A New Week

I can not believe there are only 38 days left until my Master's is complete. That is very exciting and a little nerve wracking. There is certainly no room to procrastinate at this point. Plus, if school is that close to being done, then I am that much closer to meeting the newest baby murph.

I spent my week "off" attempting to catch up on school work, but an inability to focus means I didn't get very far. I did find myself in remedial CarSeat 101 again. Seriously, I now know why 75% of car seats are not installed correctly (and if you think you are not one of them, you would likely be wrong). We had already replaced the expired infant seat for the new baby, one that we hope will get us through the first year (provided she isn't a long string bean like her sisters). Autumn's car seat was due to expire in September, but she has gotten too tall for it. So, in an effort to save money, she will get Abigail's high back booster/5 point harness until 40 pounds. Abigial will get the new RadianXT we ordered, but since she is 48 pounds you can not install it using the LATCH system anymore. If you are not a mom, you may not realize how much easier it is to install a seat with LATCH. So between all the different height limits and weight limits of each seat and the weight limit on the LATCH system and deciding between 5-point v. shoulder/lap restraint and don't forget all three need to be narrow enough to be safely installed three across in a Saturn VUE....my head is going to explode. Of course, each state has its own laws regarding how old/heavy/tall a child must be before they can graduate booster status (in VA you have to be in a booster through your 7th year, so you graduate when you turn 8). Really, it shouldn't be this hard to keep your kids safe. A little standardization would be swell.

We will upgrade Autumn to a 5-point harness that goes up to 65 pounds when she outgrows the high back booster and we aquire an income. Safety isn't cheap. And don't even get me started on the Civic Coupe which I now view as a total death trap. We will make a point of driving the kids around in that as rarely as possible. As it is, I can not safely get three car seats in it anyway.

Well, I must finish up my assignments. Brian is off to take a copy editing test in the long, drawn out efforts of trying to become gainfully employed. The hours will be very challenging paired up with my inconsistent nursing orientation schedule, but we'll get through it. Given the events that have occured in my life this past year, I can get through just about anything. It may not be ideal, but I will make the best of it and it won't be forever. Wish us luck.

Bang, Bang...A Bulleted Update

Since my last post I've:

• 6/2: 6 hours of class. Apply for parking pass one day late because they don't let you apply the day before your pass expires. Go figure.
• 6/3: 12.5h clinical
• 6/4: 11 hour clinical
• 6/5: Abigail's last day of Kindergarten. So proud of her. Drive to DE for a wedding.
• 6/6: Attended a beautiful wedding and reception in DE. The weather and company couldn't have been more enjoyable. Slight snafu with the dress I brought (the ladies were bigger than I thought. Ran out one hour before departure to find a dress that fit properly).
• 6/7: Drove back home from DE.
• 6/8: 12 hour clinical
• 6/9: 6 hours of class + 9 hours of clinical
• 6/10: Appt with midwife- up 10 pounds...holy crap...already topped what I gained with either of the other girls...I blame stress, although it's more likely the new found ability to eat sugar + 9 hours of clinical. Brian had a job interview...woo hoo!
• 6/11: Finally a day "off". Day spent catching up on homework, cleaning 3 bathrooms, mopping kitchen, playing with the kids and cooking up a tray of ziti. Happy Birthday MIL!
• 6/12: Brian takes the girls away for the weekend while I immerse myself in clinical- 9 hours today. I'm so exhausted I go to bed at 7:30.
• 6/13: 12 hour clinical
• 6/14: 12 hour clinical
• 6/15: 8 hour clinical and I finally get to see my little ladies and my man. Exhausted. Cooked chicken for a casserole the next day.
• 6/16: Woke up to find chicken still cooling on the counter. Class and last minute assignment submission. Pick up more chicken on the way home and make casserole.
• 6/17: A day off, it rained and poured all day. Put away laundry, cleaned the kitchen, cleaned bedrooms, ran around town with Abigail to find father's day and birthday gifts for Brian.
• 6/18: The girls let me sleep in until 7:30, it was amazing. Played with the girls, wrote thank-you notes, completed handout to distribute for my class project, started writing assignment, finally got around to blogging. Brian did not get the job...boo hoo :(

There are many other things that I did not touch on. Just too much to address in this blog. Between finishing out the final intense weeks of the nursing program, nearing the end of my pregnancy, feeling the pressures of the horrible economy....oh, and did I mention that student loans are delayed by two months because of a new computer system they are implementing at Financial Aid. Ya, that's exactly what I need right now.

I'm going to try to enjoy my few days off. I am commitment-free until class on Tuesday and am going to try to enjoy my family and "free" time. I try to stay optimistic and believe everything will work out for us. We're smart and hard-working people. We live within our means. We have many college degrees. Those traits and a $1.00 won't even get you a cup of coffee these days.

Mood: disappointed and overwhelmed.

Car 54...Where Are You?

I always wonder if anyone even reads this blog. It's neither here nor there, as I blog more in the hopes of printing off my entries to give to the girls when they get bigger. I tried keeping a diary in high school, but my brother and his friends kept reading...typical, no? Then I did some good journaling in college, but let that fade away. I don't have the inclination to start a traditional paper journal, so I'm hoping this blog will capture my memories and mood which I can later collate into something.

I have completed 2 weeks of school. Just 9 to go. I am scrambling to get in enough clinical hours by my personal deadline of July 13th. This date will give me a couple of weeks to write my paper, compile my presentation and get me off my feet by 34 weeks. This pregnancy is decidely more uncomfortable than the last two. Be it age, be it the third time my body has been rearranged, or maybe the 12 hour shifts (adding up to about 50+ clinical hours a week some weeks, plus class, plus my day off which includes grocery shopping and laundry and running around after the princesses). Regardless, I know it could be much worse, but it does make me a little sad. I really enjoyed pregnant. I never wished for the baby to come early (and this one certainly does not have the option of an early arrival). But I think I will be a little relieved to have my body back to its mostly comfy shell.

At any rate, I'm off to cook up some meals for the week and maintain a little sanity in the chaos.