Lost Art of Common Courtesy

It's something that's been niggling at the back of my mind for months. I finally have the time and desire to get it off my chest.

In the grand scheme of things, I would consider myself a fairly liberal person. I suppose some may not agree. I am not bothered by tattoos and piercings, but I do think derriere cleavage should be covered up (especially at work). I make my kids say "please" and "thank-you", but forget "sir" and "ma'am". I don't go around dropping the F-bomb, but I am not offended in the least if you do (nor do I think your IQ is lacking because you choose not to come up with another word in the English language).

However, I find that my peers have become to slack in common courtesy. For starter, passive aggressive innuendos on Facebook. While Facebook is a social network, you have probably friended your family and coworkers of which these subtle jabs are aimed at and to which one would relate to in a more formal way than a BFF. It does not take a genius to figure out who you are talking about. In the past it was considered rude to air your dirty laundry in public, now the realms of public feel blurry. FB is most definitely public (as indicated by the 500+ nearest and dearest you have friended). But, it seems harmless enough to write a sentence or two as a status update.

I also find the hospital a very unique habitat. It is a job, but it is intimate in a way most professional jobs will never be. You learn details about people that they would never consider telling their friends or family. On the one hand, I view my coworkers as colleagues. I share a professional relationship with them and would appreciate the same in return. When a nurse rants to me during report about how she can not believe that "they" aren't managing the patient's pain well or finds the patient's care provided by "them" unacceptable, I can't help but be a little hurt. It is said in a way to point the finger at the "medical team", but doesn't that include me? How is it that some healthcare workers find it so acceptable to bad mouth the other members of the team when they are just as responsible for ensuring good patient care. Or maybe I would just rather someone take the time to collaborate to understand why the plan is the way it is before judging my skills. I suppose this may be no different than other jobs where you complain about the boss, but I find it frustrating that there seems to be a lack of common courtesy/professionalism in this environment. Maybe I just need to accept that after you watch someone die together you assume the relationship has a deeper tie than just professional. That you need to freely express every emotion that comes to your head as a means to cope with the intensity.

Is it just me? Am I only only one who thinks everyone should follow the Golden Rule? A little tolerance? Maybe I am more conservative than I think. After all, I think it is important to have a good work ethic, to put your kids to bed early so that they can be rested and well-behaved, and to treat my fellow humans the same way I would like to be treated...with kindness, respect, and common courtesy.

Holiday Letter

I didn't get around to writing a holiday letter this year. So, I'm going to post one here instead.

Let's start at the very beginning, shall we...

2010 started with me doing my nursing residency in the NICU at UVA. Let's just say juggling a breastfeeding 4 month old, a 4 year old, a 6 year old, a new job, and long hours left everyone a bit overwhelmed. Despite the stress of Brian still looking for a job during this time, it gave me great peace to know that the kids were at home with their daddy. Now that the year is coming to an end, I am proud of my accomplishments and love my job.

Bridget has shown her true personality. She loves to sleep and insists on doing things when she feels ready and not a moment sooner. We got our first glimpse when we tried to introduce the bottle. She fought it for two weeks, but eventually accepted her new reality. Then she decided to take her own sweet time learning to crawl. I think she was finally motivated around 9 months to pick her belly up off the ground and make a real effort. She still isn't walking, even though she's 15 months old, but she will when she's ready. I think it's because she sleeps 16 hours a day (and I certainly won't complain about that). She loves to giggle and is the most easy going, snuggly baby I've met. It's been a joy having her in our family.

Autumn and Abigail got to go to the beach with my in-laws this summer and spent lots of time at the pool. They just loved it. Abigail is learning to love the water (and get her face wet) and Autumn is full of enthusiasm. Neither are little fish in the water, but their excitement makes up for it.

Autumn started Pre-K and loves it. She has learned to write her name and is very excited to learn how to read. She is at such a fun age. She loves to help mom with chores and cooking and anything else to be more "grown up". She has made a great big sister to Bridget.

Abigail attended Irish Camp this summer and learned to dance, sing, play the tin whistle and speak some Celtic. It was fun seeing all of her accomplishments. She is an avid reader, currently devouring both the Ramona series and Diary of a Wimpy Kid. She is a die hard Star Wars fan and is beginning to assert herself as an independent individual. She's torn between wanting to just be a kid and play with dolls and wanting to have the right haircut and outfit. It has been fun to see her grow into a young lady this year.

Brian found work at a local magazine this fall. He jokes that at home he is surrounded by ladies and at the office he is surrounded by ladies. We definitely need to work on infusing some more testosterone into his life in the coming year. We are very thankful that he has steady employment. While this has meant lots of schedule and daycare juggling, these are definitely more ideal problems than not having work. Brian has been the best dad to our three little girls. On days that I work he gets the kids dressed and off to school, goes to work, picks the kids up, bathes them, feeds them, does homework and tucks them into bed. He wins the award for "Best Dad and Husband of the Year".

We know there are still many out there looking for work and losing their homes. We are very thankful to be ending 2010 on a high note. We have what we need, we have our health, we have each other and we have each of you to support us and fill our lives with happiness. May the new year bring each of you joy, health, and memories to last a lifetime.

Love, Brian, Kerri, Abigail, Autumn, and Bridget

Thank You, Brian

I am writing from my brand spanking new Mac Book Pro. I am so excited. It's so pretty, it runs really fast, and it's all mine. I know Brian and I had discussed waiting until after the refi, but I am so happy we went ahead and bought it. I still need to figure out the keyboard shortcuts and a few other things, but WOO HOO for me.

On the Verge of Wellness

I seems that since Brian started his job, it's been one illness after another around here. I will not complain about juggling of schedules or acquring of illness, since neither one would be an issue if he were unemployed.

We have encountered many happy milestones since Brian started work. Autumn has turned 5. I can not believe how growup my kids are getting. They are so sweet and fun. Bridget is crawling like a big girl and loves to give you kisses. Still no walking or talking, but she's plump and juicy and cuteness to die for. Abigail has become a really good reader. Devouring the Ramona series, Diary of a Wimpy kid, and acquiring quite an affinity for Mythbusters. Looks like we have a budding scientist on our hands.

At work I encounter people from a variety of backgrounds. This always helps me keep my families challenges in perspective. They may not have been easy, but they were conquerable. The best is yet to come.

I have been working off of PC that is on it's very last leg. The battery lasts all of 5 minutes, it takes eons to boot up, and something is eating up most of the memory. This makes me grumpy every time I sit down at it. But, this too will pass. After we close on our refinance this week, I will be in the market for a shiny new Mac. Hopefully that will have me blogging again in no time. Until then, I will leave you with a few pics.

We're Back Baby!!!!!

Life is always busy. Let's face it, you think to yourself 'I'll get to that when things are less busy, back to normal', yet that moment never seems to arrive. That's because there is no such thing as normal, this is life. It's chaotic at times, emotional, and a lot fun. If you wait for it to slow down, you are going to miss the train altogether. So here is a quick list of what has been keeping me busy of late.

1) BRIAN GOT A JOB!!!!! I cried, I am ecstatic, I am overwhelmed and overjoyed. He is the editor at Ivy Publishing. For any of you locals keeping up, that's Albemarle Family Magazine and the C-ville Welcome Book. I can not describe how life changing this is for us. Probably just as life changing as the day we found he lost his job, but I much prefer the change for the better.

2) Bridget started daycare. :( Today was her first day. To her credit, she did really good for her first day away from us. She didn't cry, but she didn't eat or sleep either. When she saw me, she sobbed, jammed her thumb in her mouth and put her head of my shoulder. I don't think she would have let me go if she hadn't been so happy to see her crib at home.

3) Abigail starts 2nd grade in two days. She is nervous about the new teacher, new classmates, and the unexpected in general. I have no doubt she will be adjusted by the end of the week.

4) Autumn has started doing daycare all day. She was a little nervous about it (which seems silly since it's the same classroom she's been doing half days in for the last year). She's doing great and gets to move up to Pre-K in the next week or two.

5) My dad's heart gave out on him. He's got a pacemaker and defibrillator to help it along, plus a slew of meds. We're just happy that they were able to manage things for the time being.

6) It is annual review time on my unit. This requires self-evaluations and peer reviews. It also happens to be the same time my evidence-based practice project is due for my nursing residency program and my portfolio is due. I will likely be busy at work on all of it on Wednesday while the kids are at their respective schools.

7) I'm in party planning mode for Bridget's first birthday. I am too overwhelmed to do much more than a quiet family affair. I had grand plans of pairing the birthday party with a 'Brian has a job' celebration, but I think I will have to defer the latter to a time when I can really devote the time and energy it deserves.

8)We are going to hire someone to clean this house. I can not wait. Our house is tidy and clean, but it needs a good scour and I'm not up for it. I can not wait to hand over some hard earned dollars and get a sparkling shower and dust-free furniture out of it.

9)And in case you hadn't put two and two together, I don't have to work overtime anymore (unless I feel like it or want to buy myself something pretty). I can't wait to see what a normal schedule feels like.

My life is far from perfect, but if sure does feel pretty darn close. I feel like I've returned to the land of the living. We can entertain thoughts of new furniture or a new car. We can sign the kids up for dance classes and do all the things that "normal" families get to do. I feel like I've resurfaced and the air is so sweet. I am excited to see what this new phase of our life brings us. I am having a blast watching my kids grow up and am so proud of all that Brian has accomplished. I've got my family. What more do you need?

An Assortment

It seems it's been so long since I've blogged that they've changed the sign in process. I couldn't get any of my go-to passwords to work. Had to completely reset them. Goodness. Guess I should be more bloggy.

I've started to get into the swing of summer. I've accepted that while I may not to be the one to do all the fun stuff with the kids (pesky job); the kids are having an awesome summer so far. Trips to the beach with Gramma and Grandpa, the local water park, BBQs, fireworks, library trips, swimming, picnics, park days, sprinkler fun, and ice cream. Really, as a kid, what more could you want.

Now that I'm off orientation, I've been working lots of hours. The overtime pay is pretty sweet and I'm really starting to feel pretty proficient at my job. At the very least, I know that I am an asset to the unit. Picking up short shifts, taking heavy assignments. I've still got lots to learn, but it is nice to settle in. I still don't feel like I belong on night shift. Maybe it's the bleary eyes or personal insecurities or maybe it's just because I don't like it. I don't have a choice about being a rotator right now, so I'm going to make the most of it. Weekend night pay!

Bridget is on the verge of crawling. I can not believe that my other two were walking by 10/11 months. Bridget is 10 months old and doesn't even crawl. Believe me, I'm enjoying this pace. The no teeth thing is weirding me out, too, though. They may all be girls, but they couldn't be more different.

Ok, I thought I would write more and have it be more cohesive, but the girls are being crazy monkeys and I don't get to see them enough as it is. I can't promise to blog again any time soon, so I hope you enjoy your summer! I know we will.

What Can You Do?

I've not felt very bloggy lately. What can I say. My computer is abysmally slow, the battery last for 30 minutes before it dies and there just hasn't been much new to say. I'm kind of still hunkering down in survival mode. Getting used to the new job and juggling daily life. I've also been weepy because Bridget is weaning earlier than I had hoped. I've been struggling for a couple of months. She's eaten through all of the reserve milk and we started supplementing with formula. I know it' was a good 9 months and no one else cares, but I do. It makes me sad. I enjoyed it and, despite the stress, it was a way to keep doing something for her even when I was away at work. But, she had her 9 month appointment today and has plummeted on the growth charts. We've offered her bigger bottles and supplements and she has been refusing them the last few months. It looks like she's finally willing to up the volume this last week, but we'll have to check back in with the doc in a month or two to be sure it's stuck. I'm sure it's nothing, but still doesn't feel good to know that your kid didn't get any taller or put on much weight. As a baby, that's kind of your job. What else do you have to tackle besides eating, pooping, sleeping and growing.

I can not believe tomorrow is Abigail's last day of first grade. The year has simply flown by. She is getting to be so grown up. She has certainly acquired an entirely new wardrobe with all the newfound height. She's getting so big, I'm almost not strong enough to carry her anymore. She is awesome.

Autumn has been trying to get over a little cold the last few weeks. It just seems to be lingering. She and her big sister like to play school. Abby is currently teaching her the letters of the alphabet and math. It's really cute and handy to have a big sib encouraging her little sibling along.

Now if only I can get both of the girls to ride their bikes and swim indepently by the end of summer. It's good to have goals.