What a Week

To save time, my week will be summed up in pictures and bullets.

• I was on a cooking frenzy: cinnamon muffins for Teacher Treats Day, dinner for a friend in need, sugar cookies for classmates, brownies for Abigail's party, Rice Krispie Treats for Abigail's class....


• All of the girls' clothes were organized by age (0 months-7 years)...we could open our own boutique!
  
• Classes were completed on Thursday with a presentation. Woo Hoo!
• To celebrate I got a "warning" ticket for parking over the "stall lines". $45 dollars when cars were able to park on either side of mine and no one had to squeeze to get into or out of the car....


• We set up bunk beds for the girls and reorganized their newly shared room.


• The nursery is still a work in progress.


• According to Abigail (and all of her teachers), she had the most awesomest 6th birthday party-May the Force be With Her. (Note to self: boys are WAY more active than girls)


• We enjoyed a visit from my friend from high school. It was lovely to catch up with her and her husband and the girls were absolute dolls.


• Autumn and I took Abigail a Happy Meal as a special birthday lunch. Abigail is not a shy child and took full advantage of the fact that the Asst. Prinicpal was willing to lead the cafeteria in singing Happy Birthday to her.


• Torturous, I know, but Abigail had to have her allergist appointment on her birthday. Starting tomorrow we Abigail will be start integrating Abigail into the mainstream nutty tables.

Pin the Explosion on the Spaceship

Party Game: Hot Asteroid with Star Wars Music

Clone Trooper Abigail and her Birthday Brownie

Time to Blow Out the Candles

Decoration Station

Autumn Decorating with a Little Help from Dad

The Girls (the boys are playing in the background)

Gift Helper Autumn with A Humongous Bag

The Birthday Girl with One of her Many New Lego Sets

Autumn was a Trooper with all the Attention Showered on Abigail

(She also has crazy hair)

The New Bunkbeds

Girls R Us

I just went through ALL of the girls' clothes. I could set up my own store there are so many. This newest edition is not going to need a stitch of clothing. Between Abigail being born in the Spring and Autumn born in the Fall, we've got every season covered in every stage. And honestly, all of the clothes are in stellar condition. I have to say having girls makes it easy on the hand-me downs. Rarely have I had to throw out an outfit at the end of the season because it got stained or torn up. I don't think Abigail has ever stained anything (she came this dainty, I just got lucky) and Autumn has only ruined a few outfits at daycare (ravioli to 2 year olds without a bib? Not a bright idea).

Admittedly, I am nesting quite early. For starters, the girls' bunk beds will be arriving this weekend and we'll begin the transition to sharing a room. Secondly, I have a bit of a break before summer session starts. I will roughly be doing 36 hours of clinical time, plus 7 hours of class time, plus study time, plus family time. That doesn't leave a lot of time for nesting this summer. The next opportunity I have is the beginning of August when I'll be 37 weeks. If you know me at all, you know that I would be a stress monkey knowing I had that hanging over my head all summer. That's a little too last minute for me. While I have traditionally delivered late, and I'm hoping this time is no exception, things don't always work out the way we'd hoped.

So, this time next week I will have all the big girls' room and the nursery all set up, leaving me time to relax and enjoy the girls whenever I can this summer.

IT"S A.........

GIRL !!!

We had a lovely day yesterday. I spent the morning destroying a cake. It was quite embarassing. I love to decorate cakes, but with a broken A/C (temps 85), the icing kept melting and I was making a HUGE mess. I had pink icing between the layers, but when the top cake cracked in the lava-like icing glow, I ditched the top layer. That left me with a pink top layer which was suppose to be hidden. Then I needed a gender neutral color and tried to make orange out of my pink; hoping to avoid a peachy girly look. This is what happens when I don't get to drink a beer while decorating my cakes (a tradition of mine I look forward to getting back into this Fall).

But our friends and family arrived to learn of the exciting news. Everyone was a good sport about the broken A/C. Stories were shared, hugs were given, the kids played so quietly, and the baby was in a delightful mood. The big sisters were showered with dresses and Abigail got a jump on her birthday gifts.

To make the announcement, the plan was to have the girls pull out two little outfits we bought the new baby (after all, the girl is going to get a lot of hand-me downs and needs something to call her own). Autumn was being grumpy. Note to self: next time you include toddlers in the big reveal, make sure they want to play the game. Of course, like have a moody flower-girl in your wedding, it adds a little charm to the event. (FYI: The pink outfit says "Little Lady", which is my nickname for my girls).

I was also charmed and amused that my friends brought a gift for a boy or a girl! Those ladies are prepared. We did coo over the boy gifts that were not-to-be, just because it's the thought that counts and little boy outfits with squirrels on them are cute. Here is a pic of the princesses new wardrobe.


I have also finished up classes for the semester. Just have to do one last presentation on Thursday, but I've already completed it. I will take this break to reorganize baby girl clothes, spend some time taking a trip down memory lane, read a book, and maybe get the girls set up with bunk beds. I also get to go on a field trip with Abigail's kindergarten class to the Shenandoah mountains. The girls will also get a sleepover at Gramma and Grandpa's house so that Brian and I can celebrate my birthday. Never thought I would consider sleeping-in a birthday present, but it means a lot now.

Now, if that A/C guy would just swing on by to cool off this house.

Very, Very Exciting News

To be announced tomorrow.

The ultrasound on Wednesday went perfectly...perfect 3 vessel cord, perfect heart, perfect brain, perfect bloodflow, perfect kidneys, perfectly cooperated.... The tech even mentioned how easy the baby made her job; let's just hope the baby is equally cooperative when it makes its arrival.

The girls were with us to watch. Despite prepping the girls with YouTube videos of what to expect, Autumn was still pretty nervous. She curled up in daddy's lap and we watched some BabyTV. The tech started at the top with a cross-section of the skull. Abigail's reactions "what a cute head!". She is my daughter.

We will be announcing the gender to the family tomorrow and will share the news with the masses tomorrow evening. We are very excited and can not wait to meet the newest Murph. No doubt, our lives will be very different come September.

Almost 23 weeks. Just 17 to go. (and less than 100 days of school, in case anyone else is as excited about that as I am!)

A Moment's Pause

A very good friend of mine went into pre-term labor this weekend. Having spent many hours, critically analyizing the NICU, I am confident she and her baby will get excellent care. Now we all just have to hope for the best.

Granted, I see premature births everyday, but it is easier to dissociate from it when they aren't people you know. It was like miscarriage...I rarely thought about it with my first two pregnancies, but I was plagued by the thought this time around. Somehow knowing so many women who had recently had the experience made it seem more real. Totally illogical, as I know their miscarriages did not change my odds one bit. And my odds with a third pregancy were no different than with my first two. But some how, it felt like it could be more real. I am not going to stress over premature labor, but it does make me reflect on the possibility. This kid just needs to hang out until July 31st (37 weeks), so that I can get my degree complete. The other two always accomodated Brian's print deadline, so maybe this one can accomodate me.

Now I'm off to cook up meals and plan a goodie basket for the overwhelmed family. It's not much, but the rest is out of my hands.

The Big Ultrasound

I'm getting very excited. The ultrasound is less than two days away. We will be torturing everyone and making them wait until Saturday to do the big reveal. I can not wait for all four of us to see the newest member of the family, with it's alien-like appearance, on the ultrasound screen. A little heart beat, hands and feets wiggling, and at the end of the day hopes for a healthy baby.

In the meantime, I am very busy planning and organizing. Just found some bunk beds at a great price on Craigslist (haven't heard back from the seller, but it is a great find), organizing Abigail's Star Wars themed birthday party, and we're all set for our little BBQ on Saturday. Finding out the gender will put me in serious nesting mood. I can go through all the baby boxes and know if I need to keep-and-clean it or sale it. This is just what the planner in me has been craving.

Now that the semester is wrapping up, I'm already prepping for the marathon that will be summer session. Hopefully this will just be more time consuming than actual papers and projects. But I am ready to get it started so that I can finish it.

When I look into the future, the details are pretty vague. Right now I know I will be working as a NICU nurse. Soon I will know if I have a house full of girls or if I will have a little boy outlier. A little more definition. I will almost be able to see the whole future if we're all lucky and Brian finds a job. That will answer if we get the luxury of him working from home again (ideal) or if he will be in an office M-F (no complaints, we'll just be thankful to have a paycheck) and will the baby be a sleeper (not betting on it, given our track record).

In the meantime, I'm just going to enjoy the moment and appreciate all the stuff that we do have.

Intentions Only Get You So Far

Well, I had every intention of updating more frequently, but I can see that isn't going to happen. I am pulling myself out of the school trenches and hope to see daylight sometime late Wednesday night. There will still be two assignments left, but nothing quite so weighty. Clinical time has been completed for the semester which was hugely time consuming (in a good way, dont' get me wrong).

When I do have breaks, I like to spend them with the girls and Brian, no offense internets. I have been busy planning our little Baby Reveal party and visiting family over Easter weekend (it all ironically fell on Easter weekend because I do not find Easter to be a holiday that necessitates with a visit with all the family members or worthy of numerous planned events). I've also been doing some research on Star Wars themed birthday parties, since Abigail is just smitten with the movies and is declaring this the year of the Star Wars party. It's quite a different way of thinking, given the girly girliness that has consumed my life the last 6 years.

The baby is kicking up a storm, but Brian still can't feel it. I refuse to let anyone else even try until Brian declares he can feel a kick. That is a first that I feel should be reserved for the papa. I have also recently been getting grumpy over all of the volunteered opinions thrown at me and extra gushiness. I know everyone means well, but I am not a gushy person. The more excited you become, the less excited I become. Makes no sense, I know. Blame hormones or life stress, but it is what it is. I also find well-intentioned often means the other person does for you what they would like done for them in a similar situation without taking the time to ask me what I need or want. If you ask, you might find we want the same thing, but you just might find my needs are completely different.

Well, that certainly is a sour note to end on. If it helps, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, I am taking time to enjoy the happy moments in my life (of which there are many) amongst the chaos, and if nothing else, I am now able to enjoy a delicious slice of cake without any undesirable consequences. Sweet sugar, here I come.

Brian's Dream Come True

Abigail just totally made Brian's day. My sister gave Brian an old Empire Strikes Back book with a 7" record. A fun trip down memory lane peaked Abigail's interest. She even said she would consider a Star Wars themed birthday this year if she likes the movie. She and Brian will have a father-daughter movie date this week. Too cute.

And this is why having girls is awesome. There is nothing that you can do with a little boy that you can't also do with a little girl. On the contrary, people would probably look at me funny if I dressed a boy up in a pink tutu with pink sparkle lip gloss.

Sweet Story

Abigail had a book swap at school. She took in ten books that she didn't want anymore and got to trade them in for other books that her peers didn't want anymore. She made some great picks that were, by far, much more interesting books than the books we donated. We have now have a small collection of Clifford, Toy Story, Pinkalicious, Hello Kitty, and How to Draw books. But the very best part of all is when Abigail said, "I picked this one out for Autumn because I thought she would like it." How generous to give up a book for yourself to get something for you little sister (and no one even asked her to do it). I wish I could take the credit, but she was just born a sweet and thoughtful child. I'm so proud of her (gush, gush).

Grumpy Pants

I am tired of always wearing grumpy pants lately. I am actually making a concious effort to be less grumpy and it's just not working. There are lots of things I can blame...gloomy weather, hormones, abyssmal economy, inept professors and school stresses. The list goes on and on. The good news is that I love my clinical setting. Spending 12 hours in the NICU flies by and I am never grumpy.

I also find that this pregnancy is just flying by. With all the madness, if I didn't make a daily effort to acknowledge the little baby kicking around inside me, I would completely forget I was pregnant. I suppose I should be thankful that I don't have the morning sickness or achey joints or fatigue that so many others have to remind me that my body is really busy hosting a long-term house guest. But sometimes those pains force you to focus on yourself and push aside all of your other less important worries. I also find that I am less inclined to daydream with such looming uncertainties. I want to surf for nursery themes and ways to turn Abigail's room into one that is equally geared to herself and Autumn since they will soon be sharing a room. I want to dream up an awesome nursery theme that I will be happy to sit in for hours on end, but one that will grow with the kid.

I know it will all work out, but in the meantime, I've got to trade in my grumpy pants for some happy pants. Here's a pic of what makes me happy and makes all the madness worth it.

Tidbits

- It is sunny right now, makes me happy.

- Abigail's opthalmalogist swears she has green eyes, not blue.

- I've popped. People can actually tell I'm pregnant.

- Abigail gave the baby belly a hug yesterday, Autumn wanted to thump it.

- I am looking forward to the warm summer sun.

- A little less than 5 weeks before the ultrasound.

- I like the new show "Kings". I hope it doesn't get cancelled.

-I choose not to burden you with my negativity today.

A Hug or a Headlock?


Doing the Good-bye Dance

Abigail and Her Kindergarten BFF in Circus Attire

So Much, So Little Time

Well, it's actually been quite busy around here. No time + no motivation = no blogging. I'm still loving the career and the unit, but am hating school. Nothing new, so I won't bore you with the rant.

I had my monthly appointment with my midwife on Monday. Up 8 pounds, which is far more than I've ever gained this early in a pregancy. But, I started out lighter than other pregnancies, so I will likely still top out at the 159 mark come delivery time. Guess my body just wants to hit a certain max, regardless of how much I weigh at the beginning. Definitely feeling little kicks. No one else can yet, but they're there. Almost 17 weeks.

My friends have gone through all the old wives tales to figure out if it's a boy or a girl. I think it's still split down the middle. I like to eat savory and sweet. The heart rate is 140. The chinese gender calendar is ambiguous. Several have had gut feelings that it's a boy. We'll just have to wait the 5.5 weeks to find out. And, my ridiculous baby boy streak has been broken. A nurse at work is having a girl.

Abigail's kindergarten class put on a circus today. Sadly, I had class, but Brian and Autumn attended and took pictures. They rode bikes, did gymnastics, told jokes and did magic tricks. There was even a "strong man" that picked up a very "heavy" styrofoam barbell. Wish I'd been there. The kids charged money; 10 cents for kids/$1 for adults; to help them practice counting money. Then they are going to use the proceeds to adopt a sea turtle to mirror their lesson about the life cycle of the leatherback sea turtle.

Autumn is getting very good at writing her ones and Ts, wowing her teachers with her mad writing skills.

We're gearing the kids up for bunk beds in the next month and a half or so and Brian is still plugging away at the job hunt. I'm confident everything will work out, but until I have confirmation of that I will be wicked stressed. Watch out. My tolerance and patience for anything beyond my immediate family or the NICU babies is absolutely zero.

Spring Break

It's Spring Break for me, but this snow certainly doesn't make it feel very Springy. I have been able to catch up on clinical hours and some papers; if I can just keep up my momentum. A neighbor invited Abigail out to go sledding on Monday and she had a blast. (I was sleeping off night shift and Brian has a cold, so I am very greatful that she got to enjoy the snow).

We are all adjusting to the new routine. We cut Autumn's daycare down by 70%, so she is getting used to spending more time at home. I am trying to relearn how to juggle my time. Brian is on kid duty, but I still feel torn between wanting to help out, yet still having a lot of school work to do that prevents me from helping out.

Despite all the chaos and stress, I know that when I hear my kids giggle and see them playing together the rest just doesn't matter. That is also probably why I'm taking the time blog about the newest edition every week. It guarantees me one moment to forget about the economy and focus on the future...when I will have earning power and Brian will have a job and we will be able to see all five faces in our family smiling.

Look at me, I can suck my thumb already!

I still fit in my prepregnancy jeans, but after wearing them every day for a week, I decided I needed to pull out the maternity clothes to give myself some variety. Seems funny when I don't feel big enough to need them yet, but I guess maybe I do. The bones are all formed and should be hardening up over the next couple of weeks. I still get some flutters, but I'm looking for those big kicks that say, "don't forget about me in here!" We've got seven more weeks until the ultrasound and I won't even begin to guess if it's a boy or a girl. I will say this...my baby boy count is up to 17! I will either perpetuate this trend or break it (very intuitivue of me, right?). Can't wait to find out. Regardless of a boy or a girl, I still want to do a nerdy nursery. Science is fun for a boy or a girl!

All of My Babies

Well, I've noticed that the cell-phone sized fetus has been been getting an disproportionate amount of air time. I will now attempt the game of "Even-Steven", which I know to be impossible to achieve and should not be strived for on a daily basis. More likely, it will all even out in the wash.

Abigail has certainly grown up into a smart and creative young lady. During our weekend visit with the Great Aunts and Great Grandma, Abigail led craft-time. She prepped supplies at the house and taught all of the Aunts how to make origami sea-turtles.

And, we just swung by the local mall where the area elementary schools had the children's artwork on display. I imagined every child got to post an art project, but I was pleasantly proven wrong. Maybe 50 kids from each school got their art displayed and Abigail was one of them. Looks like she's a budding Picasso.

Autumn has learned a whole bunch of new words lately. Just this weekend, she tackled "she", "g-ramma", "g-rampa", "green" and "broccoli". This is huge for us. Being able to understand Autumn goes a long way to keeping everyone sane. She's still headstrong, but at least I understand what she's so grumpy about, even if I don't agree.

This littlest one is still locked up on the inside. Last week I was not hungry, but never felt full. It was a horrible feeling. Nothing was satisfying. At least for today, that feeling has gone away. I don't feel hungry and I feel full. Maybe it was the peanut butter. I haven't eaten peanut butter since the last big Peter Pan PB recall 2 years ago. I now I jump back in during a salmonella outbreak. Go figure. Here's a pic of what the little one might look like; wrinkly and old man-ish.

Belated Update

Well, this week has been busy juggling school and icy weather and stomach flu and head colds... At first I couldn't figure out why I hadn't posted, but I suppose that explains it. I have to admit, I am SO ready for spring. While living in New England sipping tea in front of a warm fire seems so romantic, the reality is I would likely become bitter from being in a constant state of hypothermia. Just the very idea of spring this year brings me hope. Warmer sunny weather that begs you to spend more time outside, the hope of a traditional pickup in the housing market that will overflow to increase hiring in other jobs, birthdays, stroller walks, flowers blooming....Just get here already!

Clinical was awesome this week. Crazy busy, but learned so much. When my preceptor introduced me to the mom of my patient, the mom said that she had heard great things about me the day before. It was nice to hear that people are talking up what a good job I'm doing even when I'm not around.

The baby bump is progressing. Still wearing everyday clothes, so passersby probably just think I'm fat and out of shape. I don't really care because I know better. I even think I've felt a few little kicks this week. I have to be very still and they are very subtle, but they are definitely there. It's nice to have something so fun to distract me from the stressors of everyday life. I have also found that while I am not hungry all of the time, I am never full. This stinks because I like to feel satisfied after a good meal. This does not bode well for my weight gain. The baby has all of its tooth buds, is secreting insulin, and is refining that GI tract. Go villi and peristalsis.

How cool is this picture, a 13 week fetus with an red artsy hue.

The Elfish Gene

Brian has a book review published on SciFi Wire (which was so awesome it needed very few edits). Check it out.
http://scifiwire.com/2009/02/a-trainspotting-like-addiction-to-dd-rules-the-elfish-gene.php

Hello Second Trimester

Well, I had my second appointment today and all is well. My midwife could feel my fundus (top of the uterus for most folks), which was no surprise to me since every time I lay on my stomach I can feel it. I'm up 3 pounds (which is a lot for me for the first trimester, but totally in the realm of normal and I'm sure some would say I should be thankful). Baby's heart rate sounds good and it's an active little fetus. Every time we found the heart beat it would bounce away. I didn't realize you can hear the blood flow of the placenta, but you can and it sounded just the way it's suppose to. It was high up, so I imagine this is a good sign that placenta previa won't be an issue. Lab work came back with a thumbs up and they are already working on scheduling the 22 week ultrasound (just 10 weeks away!).

I have a feeling this pregnancy is going to fly by. I feel like it was just yesterday that I hoping the pregnancy would make it to my first appointment at 8 weeks. I am trying to take the time to enjoy each day of this pregnancy, but it's hard when you don't feel particularly pregnant. I'm not tired or morning sick. I can still wear my everyday jeans. Hopefully I feel some kicks in the next few weeks, then there will be no way to "forget" that I'm pregnant. Just putting this to paper makes it so exciting. Life is really busy right now and we have more than our share of stresses, but this baby is my little reminder of hope and peace and happiness. I have my family and my health and that is what is most important.

P.S. The baby is drinking amniotic fluid and peeing it out. Go kidneys. Here's a picture of what the baby may look like. It's like it's sleeping in a puffy amniotic cloud.

A Little Behind

Well, I was trying to post at the beginning of each week, but am now 11.5 weeks and just now have an opportunity to post. It's been a busy week of school work and feeling unmotivated to do school work (that can consume a lot of time).

I am back on the broccoli. There seemed to be one specific store brand that sent me running, but when I switched back to my usual brand broccoli became De-Licious again. At one point food seemed less than appealing, almost as if I'd been offered sheep's brains. I wasn't going to run for the toilet, but it did make my stomach turn. At any rate, food is fun again. I feel a little bad. Everyone I talk to has it much worse in the morning sickness department. I'm not even that tired this time around. So far it has mimicked Autumn's pregnancy, but I don't believe for a minute that the similarities are suggestive of another girl. I don't believe in gut feelings, the ultrasound will tell us in time.

I've got another appointment on Monday and will officially have completed my first trimester. Now we'll just have to wait and see when I have to expand to maternity clothes. Still loving my jeans for now.

Here's a little pic of what the fetus (not an embryo anymore) could look like. A little alienish, but cool digits.

More Than You Ever Wanted to Know About Car Seat Safety

So, I was catching up with a good friend this morning. We're both expecting our thirds about the same time. Our oldests are the same age and our second children were born just a month a part. The conversation turned toward whether our infant car seats we got 6 years ago were still up to snuff.

Now, when it comes to car seat safety, I am neurotic. Both of my kids outgrew the height limit on the infant carrier around 9 months old. I don't think most mom's even consider the height limit and use their carriers until their kids is a year old or they get too heavy for it. The good news is that they make infant carriers to hold children up to 32" now, instead of 29" like they did when my kids were "tiny". Which brings me to the reason why we will be buying a new infant carrier (and convertible car seat).

Car seats expire! That's right folks, after about 6 years, the plastic dries and the no-seeum parts can no longer be trusted to be reliable. And that is 6 years from the date of manufacture, not the date you bought the item. So, I checked the infant seat and it expired last August. Still need to take the convertible car seat out of the car to find the hidden info (really, if they want people to maintain a safe car seat, this info should be readily accessible). Given that we bought this seat when Abigail was 9 months old and she will be almost 6.5 years old when baby #3 arrives, I can just assume that the car seat needs to be tossed. Just as well, since we need a sleeker seat for Autumn to fit 3 car seats across the back.

And this last bit is a little lecturey. The above info most of us are clueless about, but this tidbit I am sure we are all aware. The five point harness is an awesome invention, but often used improperly. The plastic bar should rest just under the collar bones between the shoulder blades. No one ever puts it above because you would be seriously choking your tot, but I've seen many moms put it below the ribs because they don't want it to be too tight. In an accident, this will force the stomach to absorb the impact and will cause a lot of damage. Post all sorts of nasties in the comments section, but when it comes to safety I am not interested in making friends, just keeping the little ones safe.

I don't know about you, but I definitely learned something new today and am now on a mission to find new car seats.

Here is a wiki link, but I found it several places. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_safety_seat#General_child_safety_seat_info

Oh, To Be a Stress-Free 10 Week Fetus Again.

I can not believe I posted yesterday. Seems like a lifetime ago. County schools were closed and felt totally unmotivated (and honestly had no time) to get any school work work done. I feel overwhelmed with clinical hours that I can not seem to complete because of scheduling, assignments I can not begin because they are not clearly explained or we have not covered the material enough for me to have a clue, wishing I could see the future and know that Brian would have X job making Y money by Z date, and feeling helpless to contribute beyond clipping coupons and conserving electricity. Enough of the woe is me crap.

This is week 10 for my embryo (soon to be fetus by the end of the week). Here's what the littlest murph looks like, in theory.

I'm recovering from a bit of a GI illness that hit over the weekend. Now I'm not sure if it's moved on and I just feel yucky pregnancy hormones, or if a bit of it is lingering. Hard to say. Just ordered some pregnancy scrubs online. I'm sure I could have just bought scrubs one size up, but I do not feel like fighting with drawstring pants that slip every time you move. Took forever to find a site that wasn't going to cost me as much in shipping as it was to buy the pants. Can you believe this town employs thousands of nurses and their is only one store that offers a piddly selection of scrubs? not a single one being of the maternity variety?

(blogspot refuses to let a line break appear here)

Well, I won't hear about my new job until at least the end February. I'm optimistic because I've talked to every NICU manager I can find at the hospital and made it very clear that I am qualified and eager to be on their unit. Of course, given the economy, even nurses are losing jobs. The NICU brought in 11 people last year and will only be budgeting for 4-6 this year. Hospital-wide, people are holding off on elective procedures because they can't afford them. Fewer people are having kids because of financial concerns (I don't blame them, kids are expensive), therefore fewer end up on the NICU. The world is a very, very connected place.

Fat Suit

Today is my first interview for a new graduate nurse position. Don't get too excited, I do not plan are beginning my career until January 2010, but they like you to interview early. Crazy, I know. Last night I was getting myself organized, laying out my clothes for the interview and clinical that I am doing back-to-back. Tried on my favorite suit...yep..a bit snug. Tried on my second favorite suit...not gonna happen. Seriously?! I flip through my business clothes and I can not find my fat suit. I have an old, suit that has a stretch waist band. I know, you are cringing. Finally I found it and that is the suit I am wearing right now. At least it's a suit and it's not like I'm ever going to have to wear a suit to work. Frankly, I think you should be able to interview in clothes similar to what you will be wearing every day, but the game dictates otherwise. Wish me and my fat suit good luck on our interview. Then it's 8 hours of clinical. And I'm trying to get over a GI bug that has been plaguing me all weekend. It's going to be a long day.

No More Tests

Well, it turns out my prediction last semester was correct. I have no tests this semester, just papers and presentations (technically, I have three quizzes, but they are take home, open note...really just confused homework assignments). No tests are my worst nightmare, but I'll get through it. It takes me far less time to prepare for an exam that it does for me to write something.

So, I had my last test yesterday. It was a comprehensive exam that was very much like the Nursing Boards I will have to take this fall. In theory, if you do well on the practice exam, you will pass your boards. It also lets you know what areas you are weak in to help you study. Let's just say I passed that practice exam with flying colors. That was my last exam for nursing school.

Woo Hoo!

Post 100

I figure the 100th blog entry is a milestone. Go me.

I was just catching up on my emails and learned that my baby is the size of a grape, has all its organs, and is getting its teeth. Don't bite me. I remember doing following along with my first pregnancy. Every week I was excited to learn that the baby could now hear or the baby was getting its eyelashes. Particularly when you can't feel it kick, it's a fun way to stay connected. Don't get me wrong, I did this with my second pregnancy, as well, but it hadn't been that long and I was trying to keep up with a two year old. This time around, I know it will be my last and the girls play together so nicely that I get the breaks I need.

9 Week Fetus

My biggest concern is about the new change in family dynamic. The girls play awesomely together, they are close enough in age that they like mostly the same things, they can both play board games and ride bikes. I do try to foster a good relationship between them, but at the end of the day I know it is their choice to be friends and not just sisters. Once this third one arrives, I will again go through great lengths to ensure each child has their space and individuality and provide them the opportunities to get along nicely, but in the end it is all up to them. Really, there is no sense worrying. This small concern is nothing compared to the big happiness I will feel when I get to meet the new baby. Just 31 more weeks to go.

After an exhausting weekend, I am pleased to announce that I still love the NICU. I feel very comfortable in that environment and can not wait to get paid for it. The one thing I don't look forward to is standing on my feet for 12 hours when I'm 7 months pregnant. I suppose other nurses do it all the time, but it still doesn't sound like fun. I never had any swelling during my other pregnancies, but I am attempting to avoid lower leg edema by wearing compression hose during shifts to promote circulation. My midwife recommended 25 mm Hg, but I think I will have to start out with a lighter compression, it took me ten minutes to put those things on the other night!

At any rate, a toast to 100 posts. Here's to 100 more.

Happy Inaguration Day!!!!!!!

Bye, Bye Broccoli

Seems the baby has fallen out of favor with broccoli...too sweet. I know, weird stuff happens when you're pregnant.

The semester has started off in shear chaos. I think after the first couple of week, the schedule will be more predictable and I'll feel more in my comfort zone. I was hoping to start clinical next week, but because of my personal schedule and my class schedule and my preceptors' schedule, I will be jumping in with two overnight shifts this weekend. I try to keep weekends family time as much as possible. Plus, I prefer to avoid single parenting scenarios when we pay a good deal of money in childcare. I have every confidence in Brian being single dad (I wouldn't have gotten this far in the program if I didn't), I just prefer we share the job whenever possible.

Scheduling stress aside, I am really excited to get back into the NICU. It was only my second clinical ever and I am very excited to revisit it with all the new skills and confidence I've acquired since then. Admittedly, I'm a litte intimidated, but I know I can do it. I'll resurface next week, I hope.

The Excitement Never Ends

So, it's still early, but I'm breaking my silence. I'm horrible at keeping secrets and am shocked I was able to hold out for as long as I could. Brian and I will be welcoming baby Murph #3 at the end of August (given my history, beginning of September is entirely anticipated). Today we met my new midwife and I just love her. Very forthcoming with all of her stats and very nurturing, not too granola, and the only midwife left in town delivering in a hospital. She is not into sonograms, but given the pressures from the medical community and the desire of many mom's to know the gender, she is open to them. We'll have one around 22 weeks to get good images of the heart.

I am 8 weeks and 1 day, which means I have an aversion to just about every food (except broccoli), I look like I've gained 5 pounds of holiday weight (but have probably lost weight), and seem to be burping an awful lot (didn't have this with the first two....not too fond of it). I've been a little anxious about this pregnancy for no logical reason at all. Statistics do not put you in danger or safety, nor does knowing many friends who have had miscarriages put me at a higher (or lower) chance of having one myself. But, after today's visit I am comfortable announcing the pregnancy.

The midwife was kind enough to humor me and listen for a heartbeat (not typically heard via doppler until 10-12 weeks gestation). I told her I wouldn't read anything into it if I didn't hear anything, but if we could try and I heard a heartbeat I would be reassured. So, she tried...and tried....and tried. We heard my pulse..whoosh.............whoosh...........whoosh, like waves crashing on the shore. And then, like a distant train..choo..choo..choo..choo..whoosh..choo..choo..choo...

I have to say, it was the coolest sound, increased my odds this pregnancy is a keeper, and kept me on cloud nine all day. Now, we'll just to see if I am the lucky lady to break the baby boy trend or if we will need to learn to like a color other than pink.

Exciting News!

I just got my capstone placement for Spring and Summer semesters and I get to be in the NICU!!! I've met my preceptor before and she is awesome. I can not wait to finally delve into a unit and area of nursing that I really enjoy. I am so happy that I got what I asked for.

Could 2009 be full of the good stuff? It's off to a promising start.

Awesomenest

My friend just pointed out to me this morning that once the semester starts, I will be done with school in 6.5 months. Well, when you put it that way!!!! Frankly, school is low on my list of concerns. Just fast foward me a couple of months and hopefully jobs will be secured and our other worries will melt away.

Today the weather is beautiful. The girls and I had a playdate this morning. Maybe we'll go kick the soccer ball around or play a little baseball this afternoon. Must take advantage of a beautiful day and wear those little ladies out.

A Fresh Start

Well, 2008 ended on a sour note for the Murphy family, but that's not to say the whole year was a bust. I am 2/3 of the way done with school. Abigail started Kindergarten, learned how to swim, learned to eat a cheeseburger, and is an excellent reader. Autumn learned how to talk (mostly), she is potty-trained (a diaper-free home!), and she graduated out of the crib to a twin bed. Brian and I enjoyed an anniversary vacation complete with winery tours. Both of our cars are paid off and only required minor repairs. We still love our home and enjoy that it's brand-newness means no repairs. We certainly can't complain that gas prices went down (I won't even think about our retirement account or home value that are surely reduced to pennies). Our final thrill of 2008 is that Autumn learned how to have quiet time in the morning. Even though the girls wake up at 6 most days, they play quietly together in their rooms until their tummies insist we wake up around 7:30. While the job loss and hard drive crash have overshadowed the goodness of 2008 in the 11th hour, we do have a lot more than most, we have our home, our health and our family. I guess all in all, 2008 just continued to remind us that it's the little things in life that are most important and that it's a good time to get rid of the excess and keep it simple.

I could focus on the negative, but I choose not to. I have a lot to be thankful for.

I wish everyone a healthy, happy, and fulfilling 2009!

Relaxing

Christmas was a delight. The girls were crazy monkeys all day, but I think they enjoyed it. They were back to normal yesterday, thank goodness. We enjoyed presents, family, and the joy of the season. Even sitting here now, I hear the girls reminding each other "Santa is watching". Too cute. They have spent hours playing with their toys and each other upstairs in their "house". It is just a lot of fun. Here are a couple of pictures.

Abigail opening a gift.

BatGirl

Books with our names in them

Pillow Storybooks

My own LeapPad

Snow Queen

Me and Brian

I'll Give it a Whirl

I am very excited about Christmas tomorrow. The tree is beautiful and the girls are excited. We've enjoyed several gatherings and gift exchanges. Now it's time to cozy up at home and watch the joyous events unfold. I have made it my mission to blissfully ignore reality for the week and have enjoyed reading and playing during my vacation. Reality will slowly resurface next week and then be back full force starting the 5th. Until then, may I pass along all of my holiday cheer and relaxation. You've earned it.

Not Feeling Bloggy

Being done with the semester, I am indulging in more non-computery type leisure activities. I've read a novel and a half, baked cookies, wrapped presents, cleaned....you get my point. Not that my days aren't eventful, I am just not inspired to document them for my tiny handful of groupies. I'm sure to post as we indulge in exciting holiday festivities, but I make no promises.

Happy Holidays to All and a Happy New Year.

Brief Overview of Badness

Brian blogged this in more detail on his blog www.heromaker.net, so I will be brief. Don't feel like investing anymore time on it.

1) Brian got laid off. We have money coming in through late winter, but it still sucks.
2) Brian's hard drive crashed, as did the backup hard drive.
3) We had to buy a new computer (fancy enough to finish off the job that he is being laid off from).
4) Got a bad grade on my Epi final and the teacher is slow to respond (rather I'm impatient).

So, Brian has had his job for 8 years. It allows him to work from home. He gets to meet Abigail at the bus every afternoon and chat over snack time. There is always someone home if an appliance needs to be repaired. And the best, Brian and I get to enjoy lunch dates and morning coffee. BUT, I am optimistic that there is enough time for us to find something new, and not just any old job, a great job.

As for my stinking bad grade, I never trust online exams. Not because they can't be reliable, but because they haven't been reliable during this program. I aced that final, so I have a lot digging to do to figure out what went wrong. Did she post another student's grade, did the computer stop accepting answers after a certain point. Who knows. Tired of having to be so proactive just to get shit done.

Cutie Pies

Every year there is an annual Gingerbread House competition in town. We go and see the talented gingerbread artist and the girls visit with Santa. No mall lines, no fees to take pictures, just getting a mom and pop shot of your kid chatting it up with Santa.

Last week we made our own "gingerbread" house out of rice krispie treats. Honestly, there was no time for me to bake, all the premade kits are manufactured with nuts, and rice krispies are quick and very maleable. I did the names, but the girls did the rest...it was messy and it was a lot of fun.

A Delicious Work in Progress

The Final Product

Signed, Abigail and Autumn (in pink, of course)

After going to visit Santa today, we asked Abigial what she thought of Santa Claus. She said, "He has a really long beard. He's a cutie pie. I want to marry him." It's just never who I imagined she'd end up with. Both the girls were so excited to see him and Mrs. Claus. As soon as we left Autumn said, "I miss Santa Claus." Here are some pics of the girls with the cutie pie.

Abigail and Santa Claus

Autumn and Santa in Matching Outfits

And, the ultimate cutie pie was seen when the girls got to meet their newest cousin (whom they believe would make a great stocking stuffer). Autumn was a little afraid, you would have thought she was in the room with a dog. She warmed up to him, but was too nervous to "hold" him (hence the leaping from my lap in the pic).

Abigail and Quinn

Autumn Taking a Curious Look While Brian Holds His Nephew

Autumn, myself, my BIL (the proud papa), Quinn, and Abigail

Back to Work

I enjoyed my unexpected mini-vacation, but now it's time to get my nose back in the books.

But first, here's a picture of my new nephew. Quinn Bernard Murphy was born yesterday to two amazing and proud parents, Kevin and Grier. And an extra star for Grier for giving birth sans medication. She had an amazing support system and deserves a big long nap.

Quinn and Uncle Brian

And now I should pay attention to lecture or clean up my presentation for next class. Decisions, decisions.

Talk About Vacation

I am notoriously a bad vacationer. It takes me almost the entire time to relax and defer my responsibilities. I am quite surprised, and pleased, that I have totally indulged during this vacation. I've blown of my ethics final for days and don't really feel guilty about it. I've decorated the house, but done no cleaning. I've played with the kids, had a West Wing marathon with Brian, the only thing I've cooked was for Thanksgiving, and I even took a 3 hour nap yesterday. Tomorrow's going to be a harsh reality putting the nose back to the grindstone, but it's only for 10 more days. Hopefully I can be just as relaxed and indulgent on my 1 month winter break from school. Good-bye stress monkey, hello sleepy sloth.

Make That 13!

I just got a birth announcement in the mail of a super-duper cute baby boy born to an old coworker. She always wanted to be a mom and now she has a girl and a boy. Congratulations go out to the growing family!

I dare you to be the first one to break the baby boy streak.

I double dog dare you.

Slacker, but Not Really

Wow, I didn't realize until today that my last post appeared twice. Why would it do such a thing when I clearly had nothing to say? Silly blog. (of course, I deleted the error, so you might just think I'm talking trash...but I'm not.)

I've had the worst head/chest cold that will not vacate the premises. That coupled with successfully getting school work done has left me little time or desire to post. To boost my spirits, I will off a bunch of school things you don't care about but I do: I've finished critiquing 7 papers for my Epidemiology class. Informative, but so glad I'm not a teacher. Finished up my arguments and rebuttals for my Ethics debate (to selectively reduce or not selectively reduce a pregnancy, that is the question). I have completed my handout/presentation for Psych. If you want a quick overview of resources available for postpartum depression in my town, I've got a handout for you. I am now down to four finals, one of which I should be working on right now. I'm dragging my feet because, seriously people, exams should not require references. I thought I was done writing papers this semester. A little fruit and fiber and hopefully I will be done with that exam by the weekend.

So, I guess I'm feeling accomplished. I see the end of the semester and don't feel like I will be burning the midnight oil to get it all done in time. Now I'm focusing on the fun holiday season. The gingerbread display is right around the corner, the Nutcracker ballet, Christmas music, tree-trimming, and maybe I'll even make a new stocking. The possibilities are endless.

This Is Me...

Having nothing to say.

I See the End

I am finally at a point in the semester when I feel like I've gotten all the tough stuff out of the way (all four paper are pooped) and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have 8 assignments left, many of which are pretty minor. Seriously, if it weren't for the papers, I don't think I would find nursing school stressful. I can cram for an exam and slap together a presentation in an evening. It's those blasted papers that leave me sobbing and lifeless.

At any rate, I am celebrating with a night out with friends on Saturday. Next week is Thanksgiving and I have the whole week "off". Sigh...

Happy Birthday Autumn

A trip down memory lane. Three years ago, I woke up at 4AM with contractions. No need to wake up the house quite so early, so I decided to squeeze in one more episode of ER that I had tivo-ed. Within two hours, I realized this was not going to be as liesurely as my first 19.5 hour labor. My midwife said I could relieve back labor if I got down on all fours and arched my back like a cat. Abigail thought this was a great game...mom is on all fours so that I can climb on her back..woo hoo. Still in mom mode, I try to convince Abigail to be a cat, too. Not so convincing. All the while, Brian is thinking he has time to do the dishes and take out the garbage. At any other time this would be awesome, but I seriously wanted to find a spot to labor closer to the hospital. Off to the in-laws who live a stones throw from the hospital. Again, I was barely five hours into labor, surely I had at least seven more to go, right? At the in-laws for all of 10 minutes before I realized the hospital is calling my name. Finally get to the hospital, hand off Abigail, cave and get the epidural only to find out I am fully dilated. At this point, the epidural is too effective and I have to wait for it to wear off to push. In no time flat, she was out and had a perfectly round head. Baby Autumn Sage.

Not a baby anymore. I can not believe Autumn is THREE!! She was so excited for her party that she woke up bouncing. We had a wonderful morning with friends and I'm constantly amazed at how independent she is getting.

I'm Three!

Girls Love Pretty Jewelry

Me on My Big Girl Bike

More big news. Abigial lost her first tooth this morning eating a piece of cinnamon bread.

The tooth fairy pillow I made her last week.

Before

After

Need I Say More

OBAMA

Pins and Needles and Puppy Dog Tails

Oh....my....god. Glued to the television, hoping VA goes blue. I suppose Brian is right. The only thing that really matters is the final score, but I can help but get my hopes up watching the blow-by-blow.

I think I mentioned in a previous post that all of my friends who were pregnant were expecting a boy. That wasn't entirely true, one is still a surprise (due any day). But now I am up to 12! The last twelve babies I've known to be born (or will be in the next few months) are boys. There isn't just something in the water, there is a specifically boy-creating-something in the water. So, if you are looking to have a baby boy, now's your chance.

Of course, what I should be doing is mountains of homework. Between psych clinicals (the demons are not for me), presentations, illness, surgeries, teacher workday, birthday party planning, tooth fairy pillow making, and distracting presidential polls....I am just trying to get through November. Wish me luck.

EDIT: It is a suprise no more-the official count is 12 boys. Surely we can fashion a team of some sort out of that.